Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
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