D3 body, D1 cock
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
