fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize