Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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