seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
He felt like a one man threesome
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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