Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Let's get the cat blown out
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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