If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
