I think i peed on brittanys purse
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
Randomize
