Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
