Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Quick, to the slutcave!
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
In America we eat man semen.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Randomize
