Your dad touched me again.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Congratulations! We have a period
Randomize
