I don't think brook has ever known best
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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