I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Randomize
