There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
I have post one night stand depression
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
