i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
