there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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