Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
