Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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