i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
