just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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