she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
