did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
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