Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Randomize