Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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