Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
