If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Randomize