O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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