its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
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