Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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