Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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