I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize