lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
