So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I smell stomach acid.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Randomize
