Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
