i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
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