My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Randomize
