Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize
