I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I just had sex on a roof
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
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