is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Randomize
