yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize