Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
