I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
