friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
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