garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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