I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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