Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Randomize
