About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
