Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
