What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
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