He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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