respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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